Model Lifestyle

We're all a little messed up.  Though I will say I have met many people who do not seem to understand mental disorders. They're scared of them. There is not enough people that speak up about the horrors that they deal with in their everyday life. I'm inclined to believe we all have them. The most dangerous thing we can do is hide them. I've spent the last year of my life struggling to be more vocal about how I truly feel. But if I can't do it than my preaching means absolutely nothing. So, sit back, buckle up, and allow me take you on this journey I'm on. It's taken me years to understand the full effect of my mental disorders. I've always been an anxious kid. My mom would round a corner and I would cry thinking she had left me. This would carry on into my adult life but in different forms. I feel extreme separation anxiety when I am displaced from my environment, friends, and family. I have seen this cause problems in my traveling and busy life style.

Back in high school I was a makeup fiend. I would scour Youtube for tutorials and makeup haul videos. I would then work and spend all my money at Ulta. Makeup was a very important form of self expression for me. Especially when I attended private school. Now days I have found many different ways of self expression. Also, I do not have as much free spending money as I did back then. This made my makeup journey take some sort of a hit. I stopped buying makeup and started rationing what I did have. To this day I often do not make big makeup purchases very frequently. I have found a very different way to use and wear makeup that works for me in my regular life and my modeling experiences as well. The biggest battle in makeup always seems to be drug store or high end. Which looks better for the price point. I do not know about you. But I hate spending a lot of money on one item. So if I did spend bigger money on makeup it usually was always a palette. For example, my favorite key palett